Finding Strength After Loss: How Resilience Is Built in Small Steps
Healing isn’t something you simply get over. It’s a journey and a difficult one at that. Whether you’re grieving the loss of a loved one, facing a health struggle, or processing a significant life change, there are days when the weight just feels unbearable. The path to healing may feel long, winding, and uncertain. I’ve been there, still here. But what I’ve learned through my own journey is that resilience doesn’t come in big, dramatic moments—it’s built in the small, quiet steps we take each day. In fact, some of the greatest lessons in resilience have come from the most unexpected places.
**The First Step: Giving Yourself Grace**
The first thing I had to learn when I started my healing journey was to be gentle with myself. I was hard on myself for not "bouncing back" quickly, but I quickly realized that healing takes time, and there’s no timeline.
You don’t have to be strong every minute. You don’t have to have everything figured out. The strength comes in showing up, even when you don’t feel like it, and taking small steps toward healing, no matter how tiny they feel.
So, I gave myself permission to rest, to feel sadness, and to go through my emotions. When I stopped pressuring myself to "move on," I began to notice the quiet ways in which I was moving forward.
**The Role of Support: Walking Through Grief with a Companion**
One of the most unexpected sources of healing came from my dogs. Though I had my amazing husband, family, and a small circle of friends who were there, their presence provided a different kind of comfort. Their gentle presence, their unconditional love, and their ability to be there through my grief helped me more than I could have imagined. They didn’t offer solutions or try to "fix" anything. They simply walked beside me, offering their loyalty and comfort during my hardest moments. Sometimes, resilience isn’t about pushing through alone—it’s about allowing others (whether they’re human or furry) to walk with you. And if you're lucky enough to have a support system, lean on it! Share your feelings, talk through your struggles even if you feel like a burden, and give others the chance to hold space for you. I know I am forever grateful for the circle I have.
**Small Acts of Healing: Building Resilience Through Routine**
On days when I felt overwhelmed, I found solace in routine. Healing wasn’t just about grand gestures or breakthroughs—it was about the little things I could do each day to care for myself.
Here’s how I built a small routine that made a big difference:
1. **Start the day with intention:** I woke up early, took a few minutes to breathe, and set a positive intention for the day ahead.
2. **Get outside:** Whether it was a walk with my dog or just stepping outside for fresh air to drink my coffee, nature became my reset button.
3. **Journaling:** Writing down my feelings allowed me to process the day’s events and gave me clarity.
4. **Self-care:** Whether it was lighting a candle, taking a bath, or listening to calming music, self-care became a ritual, not a luxury.
These little acts weren’t monumental, but they gave me the strength to keep moving forward, one small step at a time.
**Resilience Isn’t Linear: It’s Okay to Have Setbacks**
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my healing journey, it’s this: resilience isn’t linear. There will be good days and bad days. There are moments of strength, followed by moments of vulnerability. And that is okay. I don’t need to be perfect or always "on." Sometimes, it’s enough to simply keep going, to acknowledge where I’m at, and to honor my journey—no matter how winding it may be.
**The Takeaway**
Healing isn’t about rushing or expecting ourselves to be "fixed." It’s about learning to embrace the process, trusting that small steps forward are enough, and finding strength in moments of vulnerability.
So if you’re struggling today, I want to remind you: it’s okay to take your time. You are stronger than you think, and you don’t have to go through this alone.